anatomy of a saturday

My recent return to the blogging world after my extended departure has been met with an alarming lack of fanfare and jubilation from my 5 followers and the other random people who read my blog. So little that my blog has actually had exactly zero views in the past three of four days.

How can this be? Its not like I have taken this blog for granted, I mean I have like eight posts over a timespan of nine months! (my sarcasm hand is raised)

Still, I had expected to get at least a few of you guys reading my words. So I have decided to change my approach. In order to acquire my teeming mass of soon-to-be fans I decided that I need to give all of you a glimpse into the fast-paced and exciting experience that is my life. Let us begin with a typical Saturday.

5:15 am- I wake up due to the fact that I had yet again forgotten to turn off my alarm from the previous school week. I clumsily stumble through my room, tripping on just about everything between my bed and the bathroom where my alarm is located. I return to bed.

8:27 am- I wake up to go pee. I return to bed.

10:38 am- I decide that I should probably get up and be a productive person. Instead I go into the living room and watch Yu-gi-oh (I think that's how you spell it) with my little brother.

11:32 am- My stomach growls, reminding me that I haven't eaten yet. I convince my dad to make me an omelet.

11:37 am- Eat Dad's omelet while listening to his obnoxiously loud talk radio. I notice that the omelet taste a little funny because Dad used those Eggbeaters things. I comment on the funny taste.

11:51 am- Begrudgingly help my dad wash and put away like a million dishes. I complain about the number of dishes.

12:19 pm- I retreat to my room, intent on being productive. Instead I go on Blogger and blog surf while listening to Pandora.

1:02 pm- I go back into the living room and watch rugby with my little brother.

1:31 pm- I remember that I need to do my online sociology class. Instead I watch stupid Youtube videos and cruse altpress.com.

2:15 pm- I get a call from my parents. They ask if I'm doing my sociology. I lie. I then hurriedly start my class.

2:36 pm- My parents get home from the grocery store. I finish the last few questions on my assignment and get a 95%. I walk downstairs with an exaggerated sense of accomplishment and help put away the groceries.

2:58 pm- Go upstairs and contemplate taking a shower and being productive. Instead I get back on Blogger and Pandora. Later I decided to update my own blog.

4:15 pm- Finish blog post. Decide to be productive. Instead...

Stay classy